Throughout life I have often come back to the question, ‘if singleness is supposed to be a gift from God, why then, are so many Christians so unhappy with it?’ why is it that we spend so many hours of our lives scrolling through instagram pictures and #relationshipgoals posts? Are we discontent because of our singleness? Or are we just discontent?
I have heard many Christians over the years speak of their struggle with singleness, it isn’t something they look at as having value. Sure, sometimes they’ll tell everyone it’s ‘an important time with God’ as if they believe it, but so many will go from talking of the value it holds straight to its suckiness, and I can’t say that I haven’t been one of the probably millions of people to have done this. Everything in life has its ups and downs, of that I am certain. But as Paul teaches it is imperative for us as believers to be content in whatever state we are in, and the secret to doing so: a simple one, but not an easy one – letting Christ be our strength.
The thing that God would use as a time of growing and strengthening and teaching us who we are can very easily be snatched away if we allow it. The enemy will tell us because we don’t have another half we are unwanted, unvalued and alone. Through the media and our deadly enemy comparison we are quick to jumping to the ‘what is wrong with me’ delusion. If no one is after me surely I must be the problem, no one has poked me on facebook recently (do people still do that?), maybe I’m not pretty enough, not funny enough, not smart enough. It’s important to have a go-to piece of scripture for situations like this. Regularly I will find myself placing my value in my relationship status – that can’t be an issue because everyone does it, right? But God is a jealous God. He wants the hearts of his children fully captivated by him. Hosea 2:7 says “she will chase after her lovers but not catch them; she will look for them but not find them. Then she will say, ‘I will go back to my husband as at first, for then I was better off than now.’” The bible tells us that the Lord our maker is our husband.
In 1 Corinthians 7:32-35 Paul calls singleness a good thing, being single allows us to be freed up to give our full attention and devotion to God. Why then should we spend hours wishing this precious gift away? If our Father buys us a ps4 for our birthday when we specifically asked for an xbox who are we to complain? Unfortunately in the generation we live in some of us are so used to getting exactly what we want that if we don’t we have our fists ready to slam onto the table. But God is not one to spoil his children, he gives us the thing that we need for the season that we’re in. right now if you’re in this single season he will give you the strength to keep going. Being single is not easy, but neither is being married. Whatever state we are in we are called to be content. Let us not complain at the gift God has given us so graciously but instead squeeze everything we can from it.
Dear Lord, help us to be content in the season that we are in. Help us to be thankful with the gift you have bestowed on us. Sometimes it feels rubbish and sometimes it’s hard, but we know that we are in this season for a divine reason and that it will have a great and enriching impact on our futures if we give it to you. We offer our singleness to you to do with it what you want. Amen.