Life is quick to knock us down. I’ve been ill for a couple of days and for me if one thing is an issue in terms of either emotionally or physically, it all links up. If I’m honest, recently everything around me has felt like ruins. It sounds ridiculous, because nothing huge has happened, but I’ve found myself looking at life and feeling that nothing is going according to plan – my plan, that is. Tonight as I was curled up on my bedroom floor feeling sorry for myself, my mum came in to pray with me. I have to admit, a lot of the time when people pray for me I’m not really listening. I’m trying to listen to what God is saying to me and putting my focus on him, or sometimes I’m just focussing on my issues because I’m human. But one word my mum said was “overcomer”, I don’t know what the context was, but the word stuck out to me.
The dictionary defines to overcome as “to get the better of in a struggle or conflict; conquer; defeat. To prevail over.” When all around me is seeming like ruins, for a word so strong as that to come my way was crucial. Truly, I felt like I was living in loss, and not just for a day. Romans 8:37 after talking about nothing being at all able to separate us from Christ’s love and then listing the many things that try, says “no, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us.” It is by his love that we conquer!! There is NO alternative route, no brilliance, or intelligence, or holiness of my own, will create the spirit of the overcomer within my weary soul. An overcoming spirit begins and never ends in the one who came and overcame for my very heart. Elisabeth Elliot – a woman of great honesty and a woman who knew the loss of two husbands – said “Refuse self pity. Refuse it absolutely. It is a deadly thing with the power to destroy you. Turn your thoughts to Christ who has already carried our griefs and sorrows.”
Self pity is like a cancer in our bones that will take over our whole lives if we allow it. Often, self pity is the easy option. I wish that wasn’t the case. When it is the case we must choose to believe we have the victory, for no other reason than because our Father has said so. When we truly believe that we are conquerors/overcomers, we are able to walk in to any and every situation, good or bad, and see it the way God does. Nothing is lost, nothing is wasted. The ruins aren’t ruins, actually they are foundations on which to build something new. There is hope when we look at life that way. He really does make all things new.
Throughout life I have often come back to the question, ‘if singleness is supposed to be a gift from God, why then, are so many Christians so unhappy with it?’ why is it that we spend so many hours of our lives scrolling through instagram pictures and #relationshipgoals posts? Are we discontent because of our singleness? Or are we just discontent? Continue reading
And I guess sometimes it’s a matter of weighing the costs. You’ll wonder and wonder again: Is it time to leave my home here? Sometimes moving on is a necessity, even when it hurts like hell. Even though it’s sort of the opposite of what you want. Continue reading
Have you ever wanted to run away? I suppose I want to run away a lot. Like, every fibre of my being will whisper every once in a while “we’ve got to get out of here” but I guess this year I’ve wanted to run away more than I used to. It’s been a season of tears. Continue reading
Life is full of seasons, and changes, and growing. I suppose moving on from the past and laying down things that you always held so dear is a season in itself. And I guess this is the season I’m in, a season of goodbyes. a few months ago as I had just started working part time for my church I heard God say to me in the midst of a chaotic and uncertain moment, “I am taking you to a place of much greater dependency on me” and at the time I just thought that meant in an area of public speaking, I would no longer be able to depend on what I had to say but would have to fully rely on his words. I’m now aware it was a much deeper statement than that (I don’t know how that surprised me considering with God it always is). Continue reading
To the girl in bed lying awake crying,
We both know you wish you were asleep. We both know you wish the demons would quieten down and let you rest and that numbness would fall upon your aching soul. I’m so sorry you feel in this alone. I’m so sorry for the days and nights and nights and days you’ve spent, sitting alone, broken. I know you’re tired of feeling like there’s nothing left and I know you’re tired of this constant heart break that grips at everything inside of you. Please know this: He is with you. I’m sorry that I can’t be next to you, holding your hand and sitting with you through this. And I know that words won’t always be enough. But I hope this letter finds you. Continue reading
It’s been playing on my mind a lot recently that so many young people within our society whether involved in the church or not are faced with this idea that singleness means having less worth, as if the two were correlated in some way. Somehow within our media and day to day lives we have created this romance ideology in which anyone without a love interest is deemed of less value. This needs to stop. I realise more and more as I scroll through social media how dangerous and damaging this view is, we see young girls hate themselves because they don’t have the gorgeous film-star-looking boyfriend who sends flowers to their door every Friday night. How heart breaking it is to see girls and guys who somehow feel that they have less to offer to the world because of who they are or aren’t dating. Continue reading